manifesto angelino

angelino manifesto

the following are suggested rules and practices for the faithful lost angelino.  they are merely suggestions, but tried and true amongst the tigers of toluca and the hollyweird rat culture.

1. avoid bottle service.  drink top shelf liquor at home.  if you have a date, have her flirt with people who have mistakenly purchased bottle service.  have them bring you free drinks.
2. speak to your fellow angelinos.  this is a world city.  enjoy it like one.
3. learn the neighborhoods.  silverlake kids should hit the westside.  westsiders should venture east.  downtown has a thousand hidden gems.  the valley is awesome.  avoid malibu at night, there are easier places to enjoy the beach at night.
4. it is your responsibility to visit san diego and san francisco and represent your city well.  california is a privilege, not a right.  go out and explore with the golden bears.
5. learn spanish.
6. everything comes back in style in LA.  you are probably better off being yourself and waiting for the bandwagon to hitch onto you.
7. you should be a dodger and a laker fan.  liking the clippers, hockey or angels does not make you indie.
8. you will pick ucla or usc depending on if you like being a winner in football and life or in basketball and science.
9. there is a subway here.  if you can use it.  much like the open sea, there are no rules or reasons to pay for it.
10. find yourself a beach that is hard to get to and tell no one about it.