The Ultimate Super Bowl Food.

I didn’t make this, but I wish I did.  Really.  It is a stadium of food made out of the worst things for you on earth.

putting the super in super bowl.

putting the super in super bowl.

Twinkee rafters?  Guacamole grass?  Queso and Salsa endzones?  Amazing!  All with fans made of Doritos, Tostitos and Cheetos.

What could be more American than this mon-fucking-strosity?  I love it.  I love it so much I want to make it.  Honestly this throws all my recent pursuits of culinary greatness out the window.  I want to make a Dodger Stadium out of this stuff.

sour cream lines.

sour cream lines.

using clever photoshop mask blurs to make it look huge sized.

using clever photoshop mask blurs to make it look huge sized.

Here are some stats courtesy of Holy Taco:

The Field:
1 Pound of Guacamole
15 Oz. Queso Dip For The Steelers End Zone
15 Oz. Salsa For The Cardinals End Zone
2 Oz. Sour Cream for the Field Lines
The Players:
15 Vienna Sausages
Helmets – 3 Oz. Sharp Cheddar Cheese
The Goal Posts:
1 Slim Jim for Each Goal Post
1 Oz. Monterey Jack Cheddar To Anchor (each)
The Stands:
58 Twinkies
1 Pound of Bacon
1 Bag of Nacho Cheese Doritos
1 Bag of Cheetos
1 Bag of Corn Tortilla Chips
1 Bag of Chex Mix
The Blimp:
20 Oz. Football-Shaped Summer Sausage (optional) (on second thought, no, this isn’t optional. Go buy one.)
TOTAL CALORIES: 24,375
TOTAL GRAMS OF FAT: 1,285
TOTAL COST: $86.47
TOTAL DELICIOUSNESS: 1 Billion trillion, dude.  One billion trillion.

2 Comments

Filed under 1

2 responses to “The Ultimate Super Bowl Food.

  1. dellapina

    This is my favorite post ever!! Just awesome! I’m going to make mine with reduced fat cheese, to be healthy.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s