The following is my letter to Andre Ethier. He is the right fielder for the Los Angeles Dodgers. It is my intention to invite him to review Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles with me as he is an avid food blogger intent on trying LA’s best eateries. I think Roscoe’s is the best eatery on Earth, so this seems like a fair request. Let’s see how it goes.
My name is Zack XXXXX. I am a local blogger for LA Snark. Amongst other things, I write about the Dodgers, but like you, I have a love of finding great local restaurants. I was incredibly excited when my girlfriend, who is also from Arizona, told me you had a food blog. I could tell her your OPS last season, but had no idea you liked restaurants and food so much! I read it and I got a great idea.
I would like to interview you for the blog and give you a chance to post a review there. I think your site deserves more traffic and further, I think it would be more fun than watching the Diamondbacks miss the playoffs last year. I want to review Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles with you. I know this food may not be great for your health during the season, but I am pretty sure you can handle it. With Manny in left field, the odds are you will be doing a whole lot more running than you are used to. This could offset the 200+ grams of fat we will eat that night. I am an avid runner and have already started spring training for this dinner.
I know there are a lot of logistics to be worked out, but I am willing to accommodate your needs. Although I am an awesome blogger and the number one Dodger fan on the planet, you are actually on the Dodgers, and that is something to be considered. I promise you can have final approval of the review. Literally, I will give you the webmaster’s home address and you can use your magical left handed swing to knock his front door down and demand vengeance… I mean if things didn’t go well. But they totally will. We’re all super normal at LA Snark. Especially me.
Further, I am willing to front the cost for the meal (well, LA Snark will, I’m a baller like that). I know you avoided arbitration with the Dodgers and got a nice settlement this year (congrats and well deserved!), but you would be my guest and my guests don’t pay the bill. LA Snark does. No matter who they are and what the expense is in fact. It’s a good gig.
If you ignore this I will still faithfully cheer you on and read your blog, just know the city needs you. In these trying economic times, nothing would make a lot of people happier than to eat fried chicken (and waffles!) with their favorite ballplayer and get to write about the experience. I am one of these people. Let’s bring baseball back to the golden age when fans (even if I am kinda the media) and ballplayers were “in it together”. I’ll even bring my girlfriend if you want as she will have fun anecdotes about Phoenix and the surrounding areas to break the ice. You can bring your agent or family member or anyone else you might want to feel at ease with the dining experience. Hell, call Jeff Kent if you still have his number.
Here’s hoping you and your agent consider this. I am comfortable going to any of Roscoe’s Los Angeles locations, but I recommend the one on La Brea and Pico as they have some astroturf outside, which will make you feel like you are playing baseball versus Tampa Bay.
Thank you and Go Blue!
If any of you LA Snark readers have any access to Andre (have dated him, know a girl who knows a girl, etc) please help bring this dream to reality. Nothing gets done without community.
Feel free to go to this page https://secure.mlb.com/help/email.jsp?c_id=la&primarySubject=Other&secondarySubject=Otherfirstname.lastname@example.org to join the cause by sending an email.