I really want to like Kevin Garnett. He plays defense. He looks pretty intimidating. But the thing is, every time I want to like him, he just goes super-douchy on us all. Like I mentioned in a previous post, the one nugget I hoped I could take from the Finals (and dip it in some sweet and sour sauce) was to feel a little unselfish joy for a guy who stuck it out in Minnesota for the bulk of his career. Only the minute he wins he starts crying like the Prom Queen and screaming “anything is possible” in his best Kevin Costner impersonation. Tool box. Yes, Kevin. Anything is possible. Even a millionaire NBA All-Star finally winning a title on a team of other NBA millionaire stars who had never won anything either. Talented rich people getting what they want. ANYTHING is possible, Kevin, you tuna salad sandwich. Anything is possible. Even a guy faking an injury and then coming back two minutes later. His ACL must have snapped and then regenerated. Anything is possible. Right, KG?
Well, it came as no shock to this blogger to find out KG’s swollen knees are preventing him from getting back on the court again. I just don’t buy it. In my mind, Celtics really dig the emotion. There was Glen Davis earning his nickname “Big Baby” when he cried on national television after a scolding by KG. There was, of course, the Paul Pierce embarrassment. Now, it’s KG and his “sore” knee. It’s playoff time and to me, this seems like a dude who is out of gas and trying to save it for another run. That’s totally cool, but let’s stop with the calling it an “injury”. What the heck is a sore or swollen body part. These guys are athletes, they are always swollen or sore. This is just PR. Just come out and say we’re letting him recharge because he is getting old.
Before you think I am crazy, Boston loves doing this. Back when the word on the street was Greg Oden was going to play legit in the NBA (although he gets injured enough to be a Celtic), the Celtics basically started tanking games. Part of that tanking was Paul Pierce sitting out extended games for a “swollen elbow”.
Doc Rivers even went so far that year as to let his reserves blow an 18 point lead without putting his starters back in. Rivers literally said: “I was not throwing the game, or anything like that. Honestly, I got to the point early in the fourth quarter and I turned to the coaches and said to them, ‘We are either going to win or lose with this group.’ ”
In case you don’t speak bullshit or Boston apologist, that is code for: we tanked it. Just like they did in 1997 to try to get Tim Duncan. They got Chauncy Billups, then gave up on him and traded him halfway into the season. That’s the road that led to Rajon “Rollerskates” Rondo. Tight.
Anyway, KG is joining a proud legacy of swollen BS in Beantown. Here’s wishing him a speedy recovery and a big role in the upcoming spanking King James and his Cavs are in pre-production on. KG wants to be back for a few games of the regular season.
Hey. Anything is possible.