Responding to UCLA Hate Comment While On Vicodin.

Good morning, friends.  On the morning after a bunch of UCLA women (UCLA men were busy studying to apply for jobs working for Trojan men) tossed washable blue and gold paint all over the flagpoles at USC, I thought I’d take a comment left on yesterday’s post from an angry (and most likely ginger, just have that feeling, maybe cuz the holidays) Bruin fan and do my thing.  I’ll do my best to keep it arrogant, but again, the sheer amount of medication I am on makes me feel like I am literally in a Tron re-enactment (the old one, you know this new one is going to be garbage balls).

Here’s his comments:

1. (Not that the US News and World Report means anything but) We (UCLA) will guaranteed be ranked above you USC in the 2011 “rankings” once again, as it should be. Please look at those rankings and notice that we have a lower percentage of… acceptance and remember that we are the most applied to university in the world.

2 .13 and 0?? don’t know what he’s referring to – .500 in the Pac 10 rings a bell, getting ass kicked by Oregon State (a team we beat) 36-7 rings a bell.

3. The fact that he writes about Diddy Reise (and recognizes that USC will understand this reference) shows that he and the rest of the USC student population spend way too much time hanging around the more refined part of LA, Westwood/Bel Air, trying to leave their depressing location for a university in hopes of being noticed with a red sweatshirt while waiting in line for a nice big UCLA ice cream sandwich that will be spat in by Raoul or Juan before being handed to him.

4. Making fun of the 8 clap: Does USC realize that they put up the peace sign and look like a bunch of Korean tourists who just stopped into West LA to see the better side of the 10?

5. Not defacing the Trojan guy as often – I think it’s just the fact that your school is in South Central LA and which is illustrated by you all having your 1st floor windows having steel bars in front of them.

6. Predictions: UCLA 17
USC 0 (and sorry, but fuck you)

And now here are his comments with my annotations in red:

1. (Not that the US News and World Report means anything but) here’s where you will predictably prove it meant something to you when you were ranked ahead of us… wait for it… We (UCLA) will guaranteed be ranked above you USC in the 2011 “rankings” once again wow, really danced into that buzzsaw, Bruin, as it should be. Please look at those rankings and notice that we have a lower percentage of… acceptance and remember that we are the most applied to university in the world.  I wasn’t a business or math major at USC, but it doesn’t take an editor from The Economist to understand that a less expensive product will have a larger segmentation of the population buying it.  Ford is going to sell more cars this year than Bentley will.  That doesn’t mean a Ford is better than a Bentley.  It means more people CAN AFFORD a Ford, so more people try to buy them.  Essentially, your lower acceptance rate comes from the fact that more people can afford UCLA, so more apply, thus more get sent away.  Per the scoreboard in that ranking system that you don’t care about (but apparently will next year), you are losing.  Enjoy your Ford Fiesta and thanks for supporting the American economy this holiday season.

2 .13 and 0?? don’t know what he’s referring to – .500 in the Pac 10 rings a bell, getting ass kicked by Oregon State (a team we beat) 36-7 rings a bell.  The blog didn’t magically start to exist the day you found it.  If you want to understand our 13-0 record, read back, although arrogance to a Bruin is like bacon to a Vegan, they don’t get it and are mostly just afraid of it. Also, is there anything more Bruin that talking shit about a team’s record when they have a better record than your own team?  You are like the sidekick in a sci-fi film who dies first and no one really cares.  By your logic, we have beaten 3 teams on your schedule that beat you, including Cal who are still laughing about how they had their way with you and never called.  We aren’t going to a bowl because we are sanctioned.  You aren’t going because your football team is garbage.  Hell, even if you found a way to beat us on Saturday you STILL don’t qualify for a bowl game.  Dude, what are you even saying?  In the history of comments on this blog, this was the single most pathetic point ever made (it just beat out your first comment).  How it was chosen #2 on your list will haunt my dreams forever.

3. The fact that he writes about Diddy Reise you misspelled your own stupid cookie stand, Bruin(and recognizes that USC will understand this reference) shows that he and the rest of the USC student population spend way too much time hanging around the more refined part of LA, Westwood/Bel Air, trying to leave their depressing location for a university in hopes of being noticed with a red sweatshirt while waiting in line for a nice big UCLA ice cream sandwich that will be spat in by Raoul or Juan before being handed to him.  Not totally sure where to begin here.  Being a resident of Beverly Hills, I would say Westwood is shittiest part of this side of town.  It’s the maxipad between Bel-Air and the Wilshire Corridor.  That said, I can’t say I felt like I was roughing it living in a sea of BMWs at USC in a high rise downtown with a view of Staples (which now is blocked by the Ritz Carlton, but in fairness,  it wasn’t there when I was in college and I spent most of my time bumming cigarettes from the waiting staff at The Pantry).  I never understood the neighborhood argument anyway.  Columbia is in Harlem.  This just makes you sound like a pussy.  As for the spitting in the ice cream sandwich part, I can’t believe you think any of us go to Diddy Riese.  I don’t wait in lines and if I ever decided to, it wouldn’t be to eat ice cream.  That’s what Bruins do.  I kill bears and drown whales.

4. Making fun of the 8 clap: Does USC realize that they put up the peace sign and look like a bunch of Korean tourists who just stopped into West LA to see the better side of the 10?  Did a Bruin just make an Asian joke at another school’s expense?   Personally, I find racist jokes distasteful.  I love all my fellow Angelenos and the cultural diversity of this city, but even Bruins had to admit this was a misplaced joke.  This is like USC making a spoiled rich kid joke about UCLA.  I feel like I am in the Matrix.  As for the 8 Clap.  Here is all the proof you need.  You are in 6th grade and you have to go in front of a room of hot sorority girls and do a college cheer.  You have a choice between the Victory V or doing the 8 Clap.  Which is less embarrassing?  Another bear bites the dust.

5. Not defacing the Trojan guy as often – I think it’s just the fact that your school is in South Central LA and which is illustrated by you all having your 1st floor windows having steel bars in front of them.  Let me translate, you guys are all softer than Diddy Riese cookie dough, which you know a lot about as it is a civic treasure in the UCLA universe.  The reality is, we could move Tommy Trojan (that’s “the Trojan guy”) right outside Pauley Pavilion and no one would do shit.  You are Bruins.

6. Predictions: UCLA 17
USC 0 (and sorry, but fuck you)  I can’t believe you only had the balls to predict 17 points for UCLA.   Dream big, Bruin.

nerd

 

 

 

31 Comments

Filed under Rants and Musings

31 responses to “Responding to UCLA Hate Comment While On Vicodin.

  1. Rock em’ Sock ’em – but hey lay off the Ford Fiesta.

  2. Shaun Howard

    LMAO. 17 pts for a team that can’t score touchdowns?

    38-3 USC

  3. Nothing’s more pitiful than a bruin who can’t even talk smack competently.
    This ktla article sums the whole thing up nicely:
    http://www.ktla.com/news/landing/ktla-ucla-water-fountains,0,4484436.story?track=rss
    Make sure and watch the video. Note that the USC students are well-spoken and look like they’ll get a decent job someday, while the ucla students are dirty hippies.

  4. Csetset

    I like how despite the fact that you’re on Vicodin, and despite the fact that I haven’t had any sleep (from partying, not being lame like a UCLA student), we responded around the same time to the same hatemail using the same points.

    “Great Minds Think Alike.” Probably said by a guy who would have been a Trojan. Fight on and feel better.

  5. Courtney O.

    You bruin “8 clap” slapped that dumb ass right in the face! LMFAO!

  6. trojanbrand

    Ya, I lost it with the Asian joke considering it’s coming from someone attending the University of Caucasians Lost among Asians

  7. Tom

    “I never understood the neighborhood argument anyway. Columbia is in Harlem. This just makes you sound like a pussy.” Love it. The thinly veiled (to not veiled at all) racism in this guy’s comment was priceless, and you did well to only address it one time. Another classic.

  8. MakeLoveToATrojan

    Enjoy your Ford Fiesta and thanks for supporting the American economy this holiday season

    U$C U¢LA. You get what you pay for.

  9. Drew

    I think it’s classic that the females at FUCLA have more balls than the douchebags do. Good for them, but lame ass prank….Fight On!!

  10. Rob

    I have often found the argument about USC being in a bad neighborhood rediculous. That is, Westwood has never really recovered from the bruin ruin burning of the place after they won the NCAA championship in basketball in the early 90’s. USC’s neighborwood became poorer due to economic issues going back decades but theUniversity has tried to be a good neighbor and make things better there. USC’s neighborhood, although poor, actually has LESS crime than ucla/westwood does. So, are these enlightened bruins looking down on poor people that happen to have Korean, Hispanic, or African genetics? Sounds rather elitist and racist to me.

    • Csetset

      Agreed.

      USC is consistently voted as one of the most conscious universities in the nation. Unlike FUCLA, we don’t hate on our neighbors whose only fault is that they’re poor and can’t afford to move their families to a better location. Through several school programs (Good Neighbors, Campus and Community United), we work with our neighbors and the LA City Council to improve the location for all of us, a concept that seems to completely escape a FUCLA student. And yet, we’re the “spoiled children?” If by spoiled they mean we’re super rich and we use our money and education to help others, well then yes we are.

      But I guess FUCLA doesn’t care about poor minorities. It’s too “ghetto” and below them, clearly.

  11. LoneRanger

    To quote the UCLA Sucks at Everything facebook page:

    “But we live in Westwood. You guys are in the ghetto.” Sure Bruins, revel in your kid-proofed, PG-13 bubble of a neighborhood. Meanwhile, we’ll thrive in the real world. Something about hearing constant sirens reeks of legitimacy.

  12. Marko

    my arrogant comments:
    1) who gives a shit if they eventually get ranked 1 slot ahead of his on the nerd-o-meter. We are miles ahead of them on the football field. To break it down essentially this means that if there was a pop quiz spelling contest that someday they might beat us, but at any time we would whoop them in football. Essentially they hope one day to but marginally smarter then us, while pretty much conceding that they are no physical match for us.
    2) We didn’t get our ass kicked on an arorgance meter by Oregon State. Our symbol is a warrior running a horse, there’s is an angry rodent that chews down trees. We won that before the game even started.
    3) The main reason we know about the cookie stand is that when we, the decision makers, sit around the office talking about all the hot people we went to school with and all the fun shit we did while we were in school, invariably some UCLA grubling will try to fit in and talk about the best thing that happened to them in school – eating a mediocre cookie and ice cream sandwich. Pathetic.
    4) If the choice is Korean tourist and 8-clapping douche, I pick Korean tourist. They are nice, friendly, and give you the low-down on delicious things to eat at their restaurants. The 8-clap, on the other hand, only brings shame
    5) I think that when the UCLA students get to SC, see all the beautiful people there, and sweet cars, and just over all awesomeness of it, they just feel uncomfortable and out of place. When they realize they will never be a part of this world, they start to cry, this makes them feel even more out of place, so they abandon plans, get a mediocre baked desert and start studying earnestly so they can hopefully barely beat a USC person on that hypothetical future spelling test and retain some sense of dignity.
    6) The only way this score comes true is if we decide to spot UCLA 17 points before the game starts, then the games gets called on account of nobody on the UCLA team having the balls to step out on the field to risk losing a game where they were spotted 17 points.

  13. UCLA Hater

    I mean it’s the same response that would have been given to me in person in the midst of the two of us talking over each other while drinking our beer in my USC friend’s frat house, or my own, pre-gaming before walking over to the game while listening to a mixture of top of the pops and some techno – love it and will continue the trivial rivalry banter on Saturday at SAE, come join us

  14. Great clip..It is telling that fUCLA calls it “Beat SC week” and we refer to it as Troy Week. So solipsistic and arrogant of us. And you’re right: those dirty losers, who all seem to talk like they’ve got marbles in their mouths, will be pouring my coffee once they graduate.

  15. Dudefromtheband

    I’m only going to say this to all the bRuins reading this blog…

    IT’S NOT THE ‘PEACE’ SIGN. YOU IGNORANT PRICKS….

    IT is the victory sign, a hand signal that goes back almost as far as my other favorite hand signal to give to anyone wearing baby blue and gold….the middle finger.

    You know who liked to give the victory “V”? Winston Churchill…


    ^Check it out
    I know from your public school education that most bRuins don’t have any sense of world history. Winston Churchill drank scotch every day, smoked cigars oh yeah…and kicked the shit out of the Nazis in WWII. So please, have a little fucking respect.

  16. We Are SC

    As for the supposed “peace sign” that we use, you are clearly an idiot. Troy was guarded by the best archers in the ancient world. Perched atop the imposing walls of the city, their arrows were so feared that any Trojan male captured would have his index and middle fingers cut off to prevent him from using a bow. Because of this, the archers atop the walls would taunt their enemies below by waving those two fingers overhead as a huge “fuck you.” We’re not showing a peace sign, we’re giving you the most bad-ass middle finger in history. Just like the giant fountain we have on campus.

    Learn your history bRuin. I thought you were supposed to be smarter than us.

  17. Woody

    Leave it to an idiot Bruin to not know the origins of the Victory sign. Here are some other images of “Korean tourists in West LA”:

    http://www.corbisimages.com/Enlargement/BE064456.html
    http://www.corbisimages.com/Enlargement/DM3445.html
    http://www.corbisimages.com/Enlargement/BE037634.html

    When Hitler got his ass-kicked, I am pretty sure people didn’t break out an 8-clap.

    Idiot.

  18. ldytrjn

    A) If he was as smart as he thinks he is, his sentences would have proper structure and punctuation. It’s almost as if the commas and periods fled his weak-sauce, ill-informed, racist statements.

    B) Westwood sucks. No one I’ve ever met has ever purposely hung out there. The parking is shitty and all the shops are overrated and overpriced. I’d rather get a mammogram executed by Edward Scissorhands than go there.

    C) You know why we put bars on the windows of some of the dorms/apartments? Because the administration actually cares about student safety. Every building with women living in it should take extra precautions to ensure nobody can sneak in and defile anyone.

    D) Please tell somone at fucla to stop pretending those are their school colors. It’s really powder blue and lemon yellow. They thought we didn’t notice them darkening incrimentally since 1995 but we did. Stop being the pathethic little brother who only emulates what Cal does in hopes of looking cool. Grow a pair and own your shitty colors. Look at Syracuse or Illinois – orange is a horrible color and they rock it like Queen at Wembley Stadium. Oregon so doesn’t give a fuck what people think about their hideous green and yellow, they have 403 football uniform variations, one of which was dyed using highlighter ink.

    • Gotta be a bruin fan with that poor excuse for smack talk. For one thing, he cites Wikipedia as a source. Second – his link doesn’t even work. Third – his “evidence” has this line right at the top –
      “The present list only speaks of affiliation and indicates how the laureate was or is related to the respective institution; it does not clarify where the honored work was completed.” So – your “evidence” basically starts by saying “This info doesn’t mean shit.”

      I know that Burger King only gives you 30 minutes for lunch, bruin, but you really should put more time into this stuff.

    • ldytrjn

      Just wanted to let you know no one’s responded to this because no one gives a shit about a link to an article on a reference website that depends on the updates of random people, who may or may not be just making stuff up, for its content.

      See also: scoreboard.

    • Dudefromtheband

      Wikipedia? Seriously? Clearly your substandard education has never taught that Wikipedia is NEVER a legitimate reference. Maybe in 5th grade, but never beyond.

      Strike that…
      5th graders are more academically sophisticated.

  19. Jebbia USC

    The best part of the game was when Coach Noohiisill motivated the fans by saying “we’ll be better next year.” yeah, and we will play for the BCS title, bruin. That’s about as bad as former Notre Lame’s Charlie saying he would “outscheme” everyone.

  20. JT SC

    Nice to see some bruin actually read your blog too! 🙂

  21. Jackie

    Unusually heavy rain washing all the blue paint off the row without anyone from SC paying a dime? Proof that God is a Trojan.

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