Arrogant Game Preview: Washington Huskies

I’ve been travelling the UK with Galaxy star Robbie Keane.  He’s taking a break between the MLS Cup matches to play with the Ireland national team and his invite to “cause trouble” was one I couldn’t pass up.  It took me a long time to figure out the time difference (well, long for someone with a Desert Eagle pointed at their head and constant Gaelic threats that if you don’t know what time it is stateside the goat you just won in a high stakes game of five finger fillet will be killed and made for stew).

So there’s that.

Now on this stolen laptop, I am continually reading about Joe Paterno and Penn State (whose communications school probably will need to close down).  I keep wondering how the NCAA can live with itself.  Reggie Bush took money from a guy who wasn’t involved with USC.  USC gets the almost-death penalty (although at this poing, USC 1, Sanctions 0).  Penn State is literally a pedophile hot bed and while JoePa reported the first incident, he sat in the room for years never following up with “hey is that guy I hired still fondling kids because I noticed we keep giving him access to the locker room for youth football camps”.

If Pete looked the other way, JoePa was taking shots of Ambien and Kahlua to keep himself comatose. If the NCAA is going to protect players by keeping them amateur (sorry, just laughed and puked a bit), doesn’t it feel weird they won’t touch legal issues?  Like, you can be sanctioned for taking money because you have excelled at a sport, but a coach looking the other way for a decade of rape is cool?

They shouldn’t even play this Nebraska game at all this week, just in good taste, forget sanctions.  That school is done.  Penn State did Miami the biggest favor ever because if there’s one thing worse than a booster paying for abortions, cocaine and strippers it’s a coach fondling children and his boss not following up on it for a decade.

It was handled so poorly by ESPN, who started off protecting Joe and slowly letting “analysts” come on and take him down a notch.  People got arrested.  The AD was arrested.  I know it’s all being mentioned, but this story has gotten away from them and they are now reeling it back in.

The writing is on the wall.  This NCAA has no control over anything and this is just protecting their money until they all end up in jail.  If you think the banks or the oil companies are bad, just look at our collegiate leadership in Indianapolis.  They couldn’t explain what they enforce and what they don’t to anyone and they don’t have to.  They’re filthy rich.

As confusing as all this is, the most interesting revelation I had this week was finding out that the Washington “Huskies” refers to a cute, furry dog and not the fact that cold weather and rain makes the U-Dub student body a little heavier than the schools closer to the equator.

Mind.  Blown.

So, this is the battle of brothers.  Sark and Kiff duking it out.  We’ve been living in a messed up world where we lose multiple times to Washington and Stanford, we get sanctioned and Miami doesn’t, and Fondlegate runs rampant at Penn State.

Former USC defensive coordinator-turned-traitorous Northwest farmer’s market attendee Nick Holt called out our offense saying he’d rather face us than Oregon, which is fun to say when your pass defense ranks worst in the Pac 12.  That said, the biggest bulletin board material comes from Keith Price, young UDub QB, who has publicly responded to Mark Sanchez’s famous Mexican Flag mouthpiece…

…with a statement of his own!

BOOM!   It’s on!

Look, we’ve lost too close games to big brother Sark and I know he’s up there with Pete Carroll drinking coffee and looking for truffles in some Washington forest, but if we stop RB Chris Polk, we will beat Washington and begin returning things to normal in the world.

I have full confidence that if Matt Barkley comes back next year, he will get his Rose Bowl season.  Frankly, I think if we weren’t sanctioned we could have gotten it this year (UCLA is falling by our sword and ASU is going to lose more).  That said, it’s all about making little things right in the universe.  From the most realistic of standpoints, winning this game puts us as at worst a 3 loss team going into a year where we’re going to be favored to win the Boston Marathon, the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Competition and the Pac 12 (all equally serious).

I just want Barkley in a Rose Bowl.  He deserves it.  Plus, Stanford will be garbage next year and frankly we had them this year and we don’t even play Oregon, so we’ll certainly get our shot in the Pac 12 Championship.

The one concern I have is the reports of rain this weekend.  Naturally, that favors the Huskies and their fans because they have actually chosen to live in a climate like this and they know the feeling.  I know they have been planning this and it’s some weird Sark v Kiffin mindgame.    That said, Seattle street vendors serve cream cheese hotdogs and frankly, they can party with our bacon wrapped dogs any day.  One love.

It’s going to be a fun game.  It’s going to the chaos of Homecoming (right?).  It’s going to be raining (automatic wet t-shirt contest?  come on you guys are in college still!) I am going to be there, so that’s amazing for all of you as the Bearfighter brings good luck (and dead bears).

Sark’s been successful with mindgames, but here’s the thing.  He has a good-looking wife:

But Kiffin has Layla…

And by that pose, Kiffin knows it.  I need that swagger in the visor this Saturday in the rain.  Endzone, all day.  Time to make it right.

PREDICITON

USC 48
Huskies 28

**as promised I have removed the 2pt conversion prediction until I see one again**

KIFFIN OUTFIT
Tough because of the rain, but I think he goes with the winning visor, big white jacket combo.  This time though, two gloves to makes sure he doesn’t lose the plays in the rain.

HOUSEKEEPING

T-shirts and visors arrive Friday (finally) so next week should be the week you all get your gear.

SATURDAY

I will be on campus inventing new ways to freak out Huskies in the rain.  DM me @lost_angeles if you want to provide me shelter or hear a fireside pump up speech on my way to the coliseum.

 

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7 Comments

Filed under Rants and Musings

7 responses to “Arrogant Game Preview: Washington Huskies

  1. Jimmy

    We do play Oregon next year at the Coliseum.

  2. Kevin

    Great post. You should mentioned the funny mistakes that Washington quarterback Keith Price did on television, like his hand signal http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkdEKrl7xuo&feature=player_embedded
    and ‘This is what I’m getting paid for — to play’ quote http://www.q13fox.com/sports/kcpq-keith-price-this-is-what-im-getting-paid-for-to-play-20111017,0,1617341.story

  3. JW

    “The writing is on the wall. This NCAA has no control over anything and this is just protecting their money until they all end up in jail. If you think the banks or the oil companies are bad, just look at our collegiate leadership in Indianapolis. They couldn’t explain what they enforce and what they don’t to anyone and they don’t have to. They’re filthy rich.”

    Truer words were never written.

  4. “Reggie Bush was touched… by a wannabe agent.”

    “USC – Molestation free since 1880”

  5. Fail1234

    Excellent preview as usual. I had a husky once, crazy dog had to get put down.

    So the penis networks favorite team in Ohio is apparently stripping themselves of 5 scholarships for the next 3 years due to failure to monitor according to the choads at the NCAA. Fuck em, I bet the choads will let em slide with that shit.

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