Larry Scott is Bad For the Universe

Every time I think about Larry Scott (and I hope someone who knows him passes him this link), I throw up in my mouth.  Not like a little, like if you had a huge dinner and burped.  I’m talking about the scene in Sandlot when the kids are on the carnival ride after indulging in chewing tobacco type vomiting.

I can’t mince words.

Larry Scott is a monster hypocrit that borders on being a total ass clown.  He is the kid in high school who was not actually smart, but got into a good college.  He’s sneaky.  He promotes his success and ignores his failures.  He insults your intelligence (yes, all of you and myself included) by assuming we aren’t noticing how awful his tenure as Pac 12 commissioner has been.

I’m the bearfighter and before we get to 2012 and our unfinished business, I am taking off my gauntlet and slapping Larry Scott in the face and challenging him to a duel.  Take an interview with me, Larry.  I will email you questions and you can simply respond to them.  I won’t edit a word.  I am a gentleman (and an appreciator of fine cocktails and cigars) and thus would never edit what you had to say.  I am confident your answers to my questions will make my point.

Let’s get down to it.  I’m not a sportswriter.  I’m a troublemaker that loves sports.  I am not going to take the time to cite a million sources in this post because I’m a blogger.  What I am going to do is tell you why Larry Scott is awful and USC should leave the Pac-12 on principle and go independent unless this guy is taken out.

The way I see it, I can respect a man for having a different viewpoint than I do if he can back it up.  Basically, you need to walk the walk.  I’m a fairly liberal cat (socially at least), but I don’t find myself in arguments with my conservative friends because if you can tell me a reasonable reason for your beliefs, I respect that.  I’d be bored if we all thought the same way.

That’s why when Auburn came under fire and the SEC commissioner was blocking for them with the NCAA and IT WORKED, I said whatever.  I said whatever because the SEC doesn’t claim to be something it isn’t.  The SEC doesn’t think anything matters but the SEC and they know if SEC football fell from grace, they’d be left with the South without football, which is pretty much what most southern churches describe as hell.  Or at least purgatory.

When Ohio State was under fire, the Big Ten commissioner blocked for them publicly.  It was pathetic, it was antil-compliance, it was distasteful.  That said, it was loyal and it made business sense.

But Larry?  Larry did neither.  He publicly defended USC (sort of) while doing nothing but dumping gasoline on what was supposed to be our funeral pyre.  He came out and felt USC had been harshly sanctioned, but then when proceeding to draft the Pac 12 rules (which were new thanks to a new Pac 12 starting just before year 2 of the bowl ban), he stated no sanctioned team could compete in a conference championship, even though it isn’t the postseason.

That’s fine.  He didn’t want USC to possibly beat Oregon for a second time and then have the loser of the game go to the Rose Bowl, which would make more sense if the following things weren’t true:

  • Larry lost the Pac 12 millions of dollars having UCLA in that game, the inaugural Pac 12 Championship.  Not only that, but it was a slap in Oregon’s face and it’s hard for anyone outside of Eugene to definitively feel like UCLA losing by 20 to Oregon proved Oregon was somehow better than USC, who beat Oregon at Autzen without ever giving up a lead.
  • That experience RUINED the UCLA program.  It resulted in the most embarrassing title matchup in memory, making the Pac 12 South look like a women’s field hockey league.  It lead to PR nightmares for UCLA with the firing of Slick Rick and then begging the NCAA for a bowl game, which after losing, made the the losingest  team EVER to participate in a bowl game.  He was worried USC would ruin his Oregon brand in a tiny DMA, so instead he screws over USC in the 2nd largest DMA and takes the other LA based team and nukes their credibility back to the stone age.
  • You can’t say it’s about money (getting 2 Pac teams in BCS games) because even if SC played in the “title” and won, Oregon would still get the bid to the Rose Bowl.  The BCS is not sacred anymore.  The Orange bowl was between two midlevel teams and had the lowest overnight rating of any BCS game in history.  We have a boring rematch for a national title.  Michigan is the worst team to ever win a BCS bowl and that’s because they got to play and even worse team.  (Don’t think Larry’s new deal with the Big Ten had zero effect on the pre-game speech the refs got before they helped Michigan steal a win).  Larry can’t explain the thinking.  Oregon fans wouldn’t STILL be on my blog talking shit about their Rose Bowl if they got a chance to play us in the title.  They are puffing up their feathers because they know they lost to USC and would have played them again, but Larry didn’t let them.  As myopic and history-starved as Duck Nation is, I feel bad for them.  It’s best to get to compete.

None of this stopped Larry from lamenting that USC wasn’t in the game and calling the circumstances “unfortunate”.  Well, that’s accurate.  It’s unfortunate you are the Commissioner.

And if the Lyles scandal at Oregon comes to fruition, which it probably will since Larry will do nothing to defend them, and Oregon has to “vacate” their recent Rose Bowl triumph over a 10th ranked team, what then Larry?  You will have punished USC, who will be your money maker next year (which you’ve said plenty about already you bandwagon amateur) to protect a team that will have to give up the Rose Bowl you were apparently trying to protect.  It’s confusing, but then again, reasoning with idiots tends to be.

Larry has received so much praise for what I keep calling a six inch putt.  He got a Pac-12 TV deal that made everyone rich.  Like I’ve said 10 times, getting a billion dollars for endless sports content played out of top DMAs like LA, SF, Portland, Seattle, Phoenix and Denver is what the previous commish should have done.  Just because you took the suitcase of money 100 people were fighting to hand you doesn’t make you a businessman.  It makes you simply NOT a total imbecile.

Larry has also bastardized the gentleman’s agreement to not over-schedule Friday nights with college games.  That is high school night.  Friday night lights.  By making high schools compete with colleges, you are further blurring the line of what a student athlete is.  For those of you that are disgusted with the Army All American game and it’s process of having 17 year olds pick up the hat of the school they plan to attend, get ready for more of it.  A high school kid hasn’t earned anything. If being a top prospect meant something, Dillon Baxter would be 2 Heismans deep right now.  Joe McKnight wouldn’t be returning punts and playing special teams.

These are kids.  Let them commit and come earn it at the university of their choice.  Let their high schools celebrate them.  I’ll celebrate them when I see them in the endzone at the Coliseum.  Until then, let’s let them be humble, work hard and strap on the pads.  We’ll know when to make these guys feel like rockstars.  When they are rockstars.

Larry Scott is marked by the propensity to say something, do the absolute opposite and deny both. He’s sound and fury signifying nothing.  He’s a man who means nothing.  He’s quickly becoming my post-Frank McCourt target du jour.

Now, you all remember how he came into power stating the referees would be better, the subtext being that USC gets treated unfairly.  That said, when the same Pac 12 refs who screwed VaTech against Michigan screwed USC 2 years in a row against Stanford, what happened?

Well, Lane spoke out about a few calls that no one from ESPN to the guys at the local newstand could explain (the spot of the holding call, the no-call when Robert Woods was sexually assaulted in the endzone, the UR call on TJ McDonald, and of course being blatantly lied to about calling a last second time out post review), instead of getting an apology which is customary (USC got them for their loss to Vince Young (knee down lateral, Reggie Bush forward lateral) in the Rose Bowl title game, Larry Scott fined Kiffin and said their refs may NEVER be criticized for their calls.  Ever.


No one suggests taking the win away from Stanford, but at least admit the refs got it wrong.  Nope, shove USC under the rug until we are free to play in bowls, then get ready for some ass-kissing.  I say no.  I say fuck you Larry.  We don’t want your handouts.  We want your resignation.

For those of you thinking this is USC whining, realize that this will happen to you too when you are on top.  Look, I’m happy as a pig in shit about this season. 10-2, Barkley, Woods, TJ and Marqise coming back.  A top five finish.  I’m not upset about where we are.  I’m upset that the Pac 12 leader is going to ruin everything for all of us, whoever you are.  Oregon, seriously, brace yourself.  You aren’t in LA down the street from CAA.  You don’t have good weather or big city draw.  You will not survive sanctions like we did.  You should be rooting for Larry to go.  Take it from your older brother who is actually happy you won your first Rose Bowl in almost 100 years.  Larry will stab you in the back while posing for a photo with you.

Check out this exchange from the LA Times last week or so:

USC-Ohio State would be a good first matchup. Do you share the Trojans’ unhappiness of the reduced discipline the Buckeyes received from the NCAA (one-year bowl ban, less lost scholarships) for what could be argued as more severe violations?

“I was certainly troubled by the severity of the punishment given to USC and expressed that. What is incumbent of the NCAA is greater transparency and fairness. I can’t say I know all the details of what happened at Ohio State, but I know the concerns USC has, and it’s still an area of concern for me. I still intend to be an advocate for equitable sanctions and the principles of NCAA transparency.”

I don’t believe there’s satisfaction that is happening.

“Right. I’m not going to comment more publicly on this. I don’t think it’s helpful. USC has a very bright future. Whatever thoughts and follow-up I need to do on this can happen internally and quietly.”

Wait, what?

You are an advocate for equitable sanctions and you were upset by what happened to USC, but then immediately after you say you can advocated internally and quietly?  You are calling the bearfighter dumb, Larry.  That makes me angry and you won’t like me when I am angry.  I’m gonna go to work on you.  I dare you to come to USC for a game next year.  Thousands of signs will greet your ever step.  You are the king of assuming your fans are dumb.  We are not.  We know an “advocate” is someone who “speaks out” against something.

Either play SEC or Big Ten football and fight for us, or just say USC got what it deserved.  If you straddle the fence, you end up hurting your balls.  I’ll see to it.

It’s not just us that are getting the shaft.  The Apple Cup will be played on Black Friday where no one will be watching.  The Big Game between Stanford and Cal will be played in October, which is Nor Cal blasphemy (so is a bitter latte, though).  Larry Scott does what he thinks is best for the dollars and that’d be okay if I thought he knew what was best for the dollars.

The truth is, he is pretending to care about NCAA sanctions and student athletes when he is doing more to destroy the image of a student athlete than anyone.

He wants to move the Pac 12 basketball tournament to Las Vegas.  He wants to move a college event into the hotbed of gambling in the universe.  He wants a bunch of kids 1 year from the NBA to sleep in hotels surrounded by thugs, drunks and gamblers who’d do anything to work out point shaving.  There’s a reason there’s no pro teams in Vegas.  But yeah, Larry.  Let’s move the kids there.  Remind me again, what Pac 12 team plays in Vegas?  Or Nevada?

And then he dropped the biggest bombshell.  He wants to play Pac 12 football in China as soon as 2013.  Seriously.  Fucking China.  He thinks he can “build the brand” in the untapped Chinese market.

If we can’t have playoffs because it fucks with our students’ learning schedules, please tell me how sending them on a marketing tour to China (which none of them will get paid for) is helping them as a student athlete?  And don’t tell me it is a culture experience.  So is eating sushi from a place with a D rating.  So is visiting the red light district in Amsterdam.  If you want them to see China, have them enroll in business school and go there to learn, not to sell YOUR brand.

I can’t wait for next season.  Unfinished business is bigger than anyone realizes.  We are the sword that can gut the system.  It’s dire times and we’re somehow the good guy.  I always liked being Darth Vader, but this time, we’re Terminator (from T2).  We’re the bad guy who has to save the world.

We can start by winning and refusing to let Larry celebrate our success.  I want you to take this offseason being excited for our team, our chances to win a Rose Bowl (until there is a playoff the “natty” is arbitrary, but if we get to play an SEC team, I’ll be all about it) and about the packed Coliseum come football time.

I also want you to think about Larry Scott and what he’s doing to our conference and college athletes in general.

I’m just getting started.  He’s the biggest bear of them all.


Filed under Rants and Musings

19 responses to “Larry Scott is Bad For the Universe

  1. USC-TroJohn

    Three Cheers for the Bearfighter!!! Eat shit Larry

  2. Nice work. From this China planning; one can tell that he’s never actually been there. Fitting a 12-14 hour flight (each way) and nasty jet-lag into a college football season will be impossible. Just send ucla – they don’t care about winning games, anyways.

  3. Keeley

    Well written and well thought out as always Zack!

  4. KC

    My personal favorite: conference championship on a Friday at 5:30pm local time. Not only a short week for teams to prepare (and not know where they are playing), but a time usually reserved for some mid-American conference game.

  5. Jordan

    Dont forget he diluted the PAC-10 by adding 2 crap teams

  6. Chris M

    My oh my son. You are on fire. Fuck this guy right in the ass.

  7. 79Rich79

    As much as I appreciate your columns, we could not play in the game, even had Larry wanted us to. Our sanctions prohibited us from playing more than 12 games in a season. The conference championship, whether the season, the post-season, or some nebulous undefined part of an alternative season, would have been our 13th game. Playing in such a game, would have resulted in us violating our sanctions, made us possibly a repeat major offender, and in any case, given the ncaa an excuse (as if they need one) to pile more crap on our program, just as LFK has finished leading us back into the light.

    As to the rest of your column and thoughts on Larry; Amen brother, and FTFO!

  8. 79Rich79

    The actual language of the sanctions is:

    4. The institution’s football team shall end its 2010 and 2011 seasons with the playing of its last regularly scheduled, in-season contest and shall not be eligible to participate in any postseason competition, including a bowl game, following the season. Moreover, during the two years of this postseason ban, the football team may not take advantage of the exceptions to the limit in the number of football contests that are provided in Bylaw, with the exception of a spring game as set forth in Bylaw

    That last regularly scheduled game concluded at 50-0. That limit in number of football contests is 12 games and the notable exceptions we would likely ever use are, -(k) if you play Hawaii in Hawaii or -(c) a conference championship game.

    Technically, the rule regarding 12 contests affects the student athletes, not the school itself. So I suppose, if we had enough players who were not official participants of 12 games to field a team, and that team could actually be competitive, we might be able to play in a 13th game. Even at the risk of a loss in a meaningless season, it might be worth it, just to give the boys in Indianapolis a giant single digit salute.

  9. A profound and well-written article. Keep it up.

  10. Chris

    Spot on, especially the part about high school athletes. I’m sick of hearing about the next great phenom to come out of some high school where he’s been groomed to be a star since he started playing Pop Warner who gets one year of fanatic media attention and then disappears forever. Somebody needs to tell these kids that outrunning chubby 15 year-olds that play football to get the PE credits doesn’t mean anything at the next level.

  11. Rod

    A true opus…Well stated…Keep up the good fight…FIGHT ON!!!

  12. El Quixotian

    Watching a story on Super PAC’s today…quippable is comparisons to Phil Knight being the arms length sugar-daddy which doesn’t care about the Oregon DMA’s as much as his candidate’s uni’s bearing his logos being highlighted everywhere else…

  13. Jason

    A season opener shirt…student section, front row mandatory. Thoughts?

  14. SoCalJD

    ^ Agree – need to see a few anti-LScott t-shirts so Arrogant Nation can smugly adorn them in the upcoming unfinished business season. Need to be ‘family safe’ so I can get some for my kids too . . .

  15. Pingback: Kiss of death | Get The Picture

  16. Juan4SC

    USC can have it’s own TV contract and network. USC can schedule with other schools. USC has the history, fan base and prestige that will allow it to easily go independent. Then what will the pac-11 look like? Larry can go pound sand. An ultimatum needs to be given.

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